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#340212 - 06/28/08 11:42 PM
Am I a cougar already?
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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I just got a message on myspace from some dumb-ass 24 year old guy who said: "Hey you're one sexy cougar. You should be my sugar momma!" When I argued that I was hardly a cougar yet, he responded: "Isn't 30 a cougar?"
First of all, I'm not 30 yet. Yes I know I'm 29, and I may be desperately hanging onto the last few months of my 20s with all I've got, but can you honestly call one a cougar at my age? I know in porn years, if I was a model, I would be considered over the hill. But in "real life", do I really deserve such a title? When I look in the mirror I don't see an older woman looking back at me. I know we see ourselves differently than others see us, so am I just kidding myself when I find that I'm offended by such a remark?
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#340214 - 06/28/08 11:55 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/30/08
Posts: 7598
Loc: a site known for its tolerance...
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I'm going to be 40 in October and the love of my life just turned 22 on Wednesday. Pay no mind to your age and enjoy yourself. Getting older can be scary at times(Hence my stupid AWOP thread).You're living in a crazy judgmental society/city/business. Let it go. You're beautiful, talented and sober.
_________________________
"I'll never forget the moment during the lovely Alyssa Allure's scene in 'American Bukkake' where the fellow got out of his wheel chair to ejaculate on her face. It was grotesque but had a certain frisson." -Sock
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#340216 - 06/29/08 01:08 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 05/10/08
Posts: 201
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#340217 - 06/29/08 01:55 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Personally, I dont see it 
VS
Although I swore I heard Holly purr a couple times, but that could have just been my hearing aid. Besides Holly likes Dogs, she is a Dog person. Don't know if she is ever a Bitch ... 
Holly you need to put this in proper perspective. This is a good thing, that some 24 year old jerkimo is devoting time to you and your hottness. He probably shot 4 loads all over his surge protector under his computer as he typed you that message staring at your pictures. There are no doubt many many other men doing this too, thanks to your pictures here and elsewhere. So be happy, let him think you are a cougar....or a Fucking Giraffe or Platypus .... or whatever species gets him off. No more sincere compliment can be paid a woman than to have men splooge while looking at her picture.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#340218 - 06/29/08 07:04 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Whoremaster
Registered: 10/21/05
Posts: 2710
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Quote:
No more sincere compliment can be paid a woman than to have men splooge while looking at her picture.
Save for splooging on her in person, of course...
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#340219 - 06/29/08 09:28 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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40+ is cougar territory. Just goes to show how much porn the guy watches if he considers 28 a cougar. Only in porn, are the ages scaled back that young; i.e, look over 12 and you're a milf. He just outed himself on how much porn he jacks off to. HA!
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#340222 - 06/29/08 12:38 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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no
you haveto be over forty to be a cougar
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#340223 - 06/29/08 12:58 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 1283
Loc: SoCal
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Here's how you do it after 29... Next month I will be celebrating the 18th anniversary of my 29th birthday. Which is certainly more appropriate since my mind still thinks like it did when I was 18. 
_________________________
I'd rather be ignorant than stupid.
Ignorance implies a lack of knowledge which is easily correctable through education.
Stupidity implies an inability to learn.
Therefore; ignorance is temporary, stupidity is forever!
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#340224 - 06/29/08 01:10 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 03/07/06
Posts: 1059
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I'm 37 which I think is around the age a woman becomes a cougar. It starts around mid-30's so you have about 5 more years before you can be called a cougar.
However you are still a hot chick and we are still waiting for those topless pics.
_________________________
Honestly, I don't know...I'm torn. We haven't talked since AVN (other than the hearing in February)- Eric on Bree Olson
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#340225 - 06/29/08 01:39 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/24/08
Posts: 388
Loc: Virginia
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I turn 39 next week. Is there a male term for "cougar" or are guys just always considered perverts?
_________________________
"I had a rough night, and I hate the fucking Eagles, man ." - The Dude
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#340226 - 06/29/08 02:40 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5093
Loc:
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Cougars are probably in the 35-45 range, younger if they haven't taken care of their health and look beaten up.
Age 30-35:
Cougarettes ??
Cougs in waiting??
_________________________
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Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#340227 - 06/29/08 05:25 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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FYI - I am into Kangaroos myself, the whole mommy Kanga carrying the Joey/babyroo around in her pouch until he is old enough to fuck other young Kangaroo's bestirs my MILF fetish.
When I was researching My Madison Ivy thread, I saw I wanna cum inside your Mom. So I looked up MILFs...Gia is in a Milf movie, somewhere. I know I saw it.
Holly, I can relate to the panic...I shall be 41 in September, and last year I was squirming 2 weeks out from my 40th, because, up until then, I could tell all the 20-something whores I entertained that I was "in my 30s" (and whilst whores lie, Burg Never lies to whores...mainly cuz, well I dont have to), but being in My 40s, I was afraid they would overlook my cuteness and instead see Kevin Spacey...pause to see who gets it. Shit I forgot to pause to see who will get my Kangaroo/Milf connection. Only Gia I suppose. Maybe Gigi.
FYI#2 I've never splooged to a Holly Pic...cuz actually I did lie a little in my previous post. There is actually ONE slightly higher compliment you can pay a woman. Fuck me if I am telling you perverts what that is.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#340229 - 06/29/08 05:55 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5093
Loc:
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I think they have you as a Latina in some compilations out there. Soon the combinations will become more esoteric and you will appear in a Latina MILF compilation.
_________________________
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Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#340230 - 06/29/08 05:59 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Latina is fine, but no way did I look milfy in 2003-2006 when I did porn. Or now really.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#340231 - 06/29/08 08:25 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 02/28/06
Posts: 137
Loc: california
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The most accepted definition on Urban Dictionary isn't all that bad: "An older woman who frequents clubs in order to score with a much younger man. The cougar can be anyone from an overly surgically altered wind tunnel victim, to an absolute sad and bloated old horn-meister, to a real hottie or milf. Cougars are gaining in popularity -- particularly the true hotties -- as young men find not only a sexual high, but many times a chick with her shit together." Example: That cougar I met last night, showed me shit I didn't know existed, I'm goin back for more. 3726 thumbs up, 480 down http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cougarSeeeeeeeeee a "cougar" can be "real hottie" with her "shit together" and gives young men a "sexual high." I don't think there's much chance you a "sad and bloated old horn-meister" Holly.
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#340232 - 06/29/08 10:45 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9181
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Quote:
Cougars are probably in the 35-45 range, younger if they haven't taken care of their health and look beaten up.
Age 30-35:
Cougarettes ??
Cougs in waiting??
www.cougarrecruits.com 
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#340235 - 06/30/08 03:26 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Quote:
WHAT?!! I never did a single MILF movie in my life. That must be a comp from something originally non-milf.
Fuckin' duh... it may have been a comp, or not. Like sex in general, it's all in the mind and what people want to believe.... but fuck me if I am going back and looking for the specific title. I found it by accident, but go ahead and research it, you will find it I am sure. I saw many other YOUNG girls listed in MILF movies. Not surprising, porn is mostly bullshit anyway, why should this be different.
Hillarity snott and Leah Luv-no-good are MILFS technically...so is Sierra Sinn (a MILDF ..."Mom I, Like, Dont wanna FUCK") If Madison Ivy shit out a kid at age 16, she now qualifies....similarly, I am sure there are some near 40 women who never were fertilized cuz they are smart and always swallow, so they have no kids, who look convincingly like MILFs, but are not. You get the point.
In Holly's case, I am 100% sure, she loves her dogs, and her horse, probably even her house plants, like a mother because she has those qualities inside her. Ergo, in some warped yet well meaning perverts mind, when he whacks off thinking about her, it may involve a MILF angle.
Who gives a shit? A couple whores in the past have called me a "Father Figure" in their lives, even after I had them gobble, or play Scrabble in the nude, or tell me "Why?" they did what they did...how fucked up is that??? The only things in my life I ever took care of in a remotely parental manner were my Peruvian Goldfish, Bartholomew and Napoleon. Napoleon dominated BArtholomew until one day Bartholomew snapped and bludgeoned Napoleon to death with a twig that was part of the authentic environment of a pond in Peru I tried to provide my "Children"....I feel responsible but I still sleep at night. But I am an awesome Uncle in real life.
Next up: Burg predicts a NEWsexual "Fad/Fetish" that originates amongst 16-18 year old teen GIRLS.. D-DILDOs "Deadbeat Dads I, Like, Dont Ordinaily FUCK (But will for 200 bucks and some Pot)"
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#340236 - 06/30/08 05:40 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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Burg wrote: Quote:
...I was afraid they would overlook my cuteness and instead see Kevin Spacey...pause to see who gets it.
That was a very appropiate reference, Mr. Burg. And a nice movie.
Quote:
FYI#2 I've never splooged to a Holly Pic...cuz actually I did lie a little in my previous post. There is actually ONE slightly higher compliment you can pay a woman. Fuck me if I am telling you perverts what that is.
I have an idea of what you mean. For me, it's a standard that is not discussed nor elaborated on.
_________________________
The only thing you got that I want, is your suffering.
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#340237 - 06/30/08 06:20 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
Congrats, you're the new Darth!
Holly, kudos on a spectacular double owning (here and in the stalker thread.) But I think the title of "New Darth" belongs to our new, self-proclaimed insider, misterz.
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#340240 - 06/30/08 07:04 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
I like kangaroos. 
I like turtles.
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#340241 - 06/30/08 07:38 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 10/30/06
Posts: 3812
Loc: Neither here, nor there.
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30-39 = MILF 40-49 = Cougar 49+ = GILF 
_________________________
"You know this is XXXPornTalk.com right? You sound like an ADT person. I want to poop on you." -Malice
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#340242 - 06/30/08 09:42 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 204
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Quote:
I Yes I know I'm 29, and I may be desperately hanging onto the last few months of my 20s with all I've got, but can you honestly call one a cougar at my age?
When I turned 30, I went from twenty-nine to twenty-ten.
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#340243 - 06/30/08 10:03 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Quote:
I must say it takes a certain kind of douchebag talent to take an originally offensive remark and turn it upside down into a whole new insult. Congrats, you're the new Darth!
Wioked backhand for matchpoint.
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#340245 - 06/30/08 01:04 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 02/28/06
Posts: 137
Loc: california
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Quote:
Actually, Holly, I believe it was a typo and he was truly trying to pay you a compliment. See what a small difference can make:
Quote:
I don't think there's much chance you're a "sad and bloated old horn-meister" Holly.
FIXED
Yes you are correct Bad Habit, in fact, I thought I fixed that typo although it is not appearing now. Even so, it still is phrased in the negative, "I don't think ..." so I think the meaning should have been clear.
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#340246 - 06/30/08 01:16 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 1283
Loc: SoCal
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Either way, Holly is the one you should be apologizing to for your error.
I certainly wouldn't want to have a beautiful and intelligent woman mad at me. It's counter-productive on so many different levels.
_________________________
I'd rather be ignorant than stupid.
Ignorance implies a lack of knowledge which is easily correctable through education.
Stupidity implies an inability to learn.
Therefore; ignorance is temporary, stupidity is forever!
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#340247 - 06/30/08 01:21 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5093
Loc:
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Hmmm. I like the female cat names to denote a sexy older woman (age unknown, but older than her male counterpart) -
tigress? (for some cat scratch fever)
lioness? (the reverse cowgirl will kiiiilllll yoouuuuu)
They are probably as appropriate as 'cougar' and scream "watch out! dangerous feline approaches"
_________________________
-------------------
Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#340251 - 06/30/08 01:44 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 02/28/06
Posts: 137
Loc: california
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Quote:
I did, see my post above... I guess I'm still jumpy from Darth's cruel blows to my ego. 
I appreciate that. Thank you. Sorry for any confusion on my part.
I do not engage in cruel or mean spirited unprovoked posts here or on my own forum.
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#340252 - 06/30/08 04:10 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Guys don't understand (generally, not ALL guys) that terms like MILF or cougar sound hot to them but are euphemisms for old to us. And cougar??? getting called a cougar when you're barely 30 is like seeing your life flash before your eyes for those of us who barely even look old enough to be MILFS yet.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#340253 - 06/30/08 04:29 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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^^^right, it's kind of like telling a sort-of recovering anorexic that she's 'looking healthier'. 
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#340254 - 06/30/08 06:13 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 1283
Loc: SoCal
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The only thing you girls need to stay healthy are tongue baths and hot beef injections!
(sorry, the pervert broke free for a second)
_________________________
I'd rather be ignorant than stupid.
Ignorance implies a lack of knowledge which is easily correctable through education.
Stupidity implies an inability to learn.
Therefore; ignorance is temporary, stupidity is forever!
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#340256 - 07/01/08 04:52 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 11/14/04
Posts: 1460
Loc: Down there
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In no way is Holly even close to being a "cougar." A "cougar" is a woman who just hit her 40's, probably single (divorced or widowed), no kids, who's on the prowl for some much younger cock. As long as it's of age, a "cougar" will fuck it.
Holly those pics of you are breathtaking.
_________________________
I like me some Gia'd Jerkins.
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#340257 - 07/01/08 10:34 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 12/24/07
Posts: 997
Loc: FL
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As everyone else has said.cougars are 40's and up. I did a cougar scene once for cougarsinheat.com..and they tried to age me with makeup since I'm only 34(the pic in my avatar is from that shoot). Oddly enough...I dont think I look older(I dont even look my age normally..I usually get mid 20's when people guess)and they are some of the most gorgeous pics of me!! I usually hate my own pics..but that photog was AMAZING!!
Holly..if I had to guess your age based on those pics I'd have said 22.Cougar??That guy must have been on crack
_________________________
myspace.com/pornstarcameronkeys
twitter.com/cameronkeys
cameronkeys.com
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#340259 - 07/01/08 07:47 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
Quote:
^^^right, it's kind of like telling a sort-of recovering anorexic that she's 'looking healthier'.
I once told a Seconal whore
AHHHHHHHHHHHH omfg haven't had those in years, they're very high on the best pills list.  
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#340260 - 07/01/08 08:14 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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I hate seconal ... yet another drug you have to have the blood pressure cuff and pulse monitor, along with a hand mirror handy to see if she is still breathing, when "entertaining" hired, um, entertainers. Above referenced whore also fell asleep in the chicken pot pie I made...peas and carrots actually look hotter on a drugged out chick than creep splooge though so it wasnt a total disaster. Holly, I am very sorry about semi-hijacking your "Holly's Undisputed beauty"-meets-"Animal Planet" identity crisis thread into yet another drugged out whores discussion (but always go with your best pitch Grandma Burglar used to tell me.) But like I said it was much ado about nothing, you being a goddamn mountain lion or whatever the fuck....! Forgive me, I owe you more sausages, or something yellow. Do you have any tales of chicks passing out during a shoot 'cuz they popped too many whatever? please share.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#340261 - 07/01/08 08:32 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
I hate seconal ... yet another drug you have to have the blood pressure cuff and pulse monitor, along with a hand mirror handy to see if she is still breathing
I totally agree, very very dangerous and if you hate them, mail em to me.
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#340267 - 07/02/08 10:06 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/05/05
Posts: 4468
Loc: Great America
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#340269 - 07/02/08 11:37 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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AC Cream Wannabe
Registered: 03/05/07
Posts: 529
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i wouldn't worry too much about what any 24 year old says. ever. i'll come over there and do ya right now.
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#340270 - 07/02/08 12:10 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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 I'm going to derail this to say, I had 71 model XR7 in High School (minus the fuzzy dice). God Damn was it fast! :bananawhitetrash: P.S. there are NO cougars on this board.
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#340271 - 07/02/08 01:22 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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i'm 34 and i actually find it amusing/hot that i am entering cougar territory. now please excuse me while i go find a hot piece of nineteen year-old ass to teach how to fuck properly.
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#340273 - 07/02/08 03:21 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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um, no luck finding one yet. plus, after i made that post i remembered that i generally prefer the older mens. way less self-absorbed and shit.
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#340274 - 07/02/08 04:01 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9181
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Quote:
um, no luck finding one yet.
Ask the Hulkster's wife. She seems pretty good at finding and fucking her daughter's school friends.
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#340275 - 07/02/08 05:02 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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i've decided to save my cougaring for shia laboeuf.
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#340278 - 07/02/08 09:18 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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@
Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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I'm not sure who this^ faggot is replying to because this thread is infected with "the gay" and I refuse to read it.
But rest assured, ignoring his textual diarrhea is not only recommended, it's encouraged.
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#340280 - 07/02/08 10:28 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9181
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Quote:
I love being 34 and wouldnt be a naive kid again for a million...but call it like it is 25-40=MILF 40+ =cougar.Specifically a 40+ woman who goes after guys 8 years or more younger then her.
i volunteer for sex scenes, enlist cameron keys...hot whore...do it...
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#340285 - 07/03/08 01:30 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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um, that wasn't very funny. 
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#340292 - 07/05/08 08:42 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/07/06
Posts: 4268
Loc: Portland
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What? No MILF Island reference? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nziijRfp94http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MILF_Island"Confusion was caused prior to the broadcast of this episode when many critics speculated about how the episode would tackle the use of the word MILF without actually explaining that it is an acronym for "Mother I'd Like to Fuck", as that would have broken Federal Communications Commission rules. The situation was compared to the episode of Seinfeld called "The Contest" which features the subject of masturbation but the characters could never actually say the word "masturbation.""
_________________________
"My people (the real Americans- descended from the original Angle-Saxon pioneers)"-Coke S.
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#340295 - 07/07/08 12:06 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Quote:
I think he was trying to be cheeky and get a response from you Holly. I only heard about "Cougars" from Mark Phillippoussis's show "Age of Love" - wasn't that where they invented the term? Like how "MILF" came from "American Pie" ? I've never heard anyone use these terms outside of these shows apart from in porn movies :-P I think its more about the look than your age and you definitely don't look old! And don't worry about turning 30!
A short tale if you will...
I had a pair of coworkers back in PA, one of which was older (in his late 40's) and didn't know anything about MILF. The other was quite saavy with such 'hip' terms.
During a short run from Allentown into Jersey, they discuss the term 'MILF'. The elder coworker was so enamored by this term, he thought it was genius. Apparently, he also thought it was fairly discrete.
Upon arrival in Jersey, they check into their hotel rooms. In the lobby, elder gent sees a hot broad in her late 30's / early 40's. He turns to his coworker, and says, "Hey (name), that's a pretty hot MILF there [points to said MILF]".
Obviously, said hot broad took notice of his comment, and the coworker just held his head in his hands. I envision this a situation like some strange foreigner, almost Borat-like, not quite grasping their earlier discussion about MILF's, and figuring it was some kind of code between the guys.
This is all hearsay, of course. And, well, it wasn't short either.
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#340296 - 07/07/08 03:25 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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My high school's mascot was the cougar.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#340300 - 07/15/08 05:41 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Human Garbage
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 1621
Loc: Hell
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Quote:
I just got a message on myspace from some dumb-ass 24 year old guy who said: "Hey you're one sexy cougar. You should be my sugar momma!" When I argued that I was hardly a cougar yet, he responded: "Isn't 30 a cougar?"
First of all, I'm not 30 yet. Yes I know I'm 29, and I may be desperately hanging onto the last few months of my 20s with all I've got, but can you honestly call one a cougar at my age? I know in porn years, if I was a model, I would be considered over the hill. But in "real life", do I really deserve such a title? When I look in the mirror I don't see an older woman looking back at me. I know we see ourselves differently than others see us, so am I just kidding myself when I find that I'm offended by such a remark?
Cougar is a woman who dates much younger men. Like a Demi Moore. Maybe he meant to say MILF but you're not that either unless you have children.
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#340301 - 07/15/08 05:43 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Human Garbage
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 1621
Loc: Hell
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Quote:
Why was Holly in a wheelchair? 
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#340302 - 07/15/08 05:48 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Human Garbage
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 1621
Loc: Hell
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Quote:
Nah, I like older men-- the guy I've been crushing on for the past year and a half is 48.
I prefer older men as well. But when you say crushing on, does that mean you like him but he hasn't returned the favor?
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#340303 - 07/15/08 06:54 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9181
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#340305 - 07/15/08 07:55 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 07/11/08
Posts: 48
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I think your nuts...or I'm jealous.  Either way he was in college when you were in diapers. From my perspective (I'm 27) that guy is 3 years younger than my mom!
_________________________
"When you get two cocks in one hole and the guys are staying hard they're fucking gay." -Jenna Haze
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#340308 - 07/16/08 04:27 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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i don't think i am a cougar, but according to the placemat at the fake chinese restaurant i just ate at, i am a 'tiger', and as such am supposed to avoid the 'monkey' at all costs.
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#340310 - 07/21/08 10:00 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Quote:
Cougar is a woman who dates much younger men. Like a Demi Moore. Maybe he meant to say MILF but you're not that either unless you have children.
WOW! You are a fucking genius. Did you look that up on Google, Wikipedia or UrbanDictionary.com?
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#340311 - 07/21/08 01:43 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Human Garbage
Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 1621
Loc: Hell
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Quote:
WOW! You are a fucking genius. Did you look that up on Google, Wikipedia or UrbanDictionary.com?
No, your dad told me while we were fucking. Your mom was there recording everything. Sorry.
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#340320 - 07/25/08 02:41 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Pervert
Registered: 08/05/05
Posts: 2116
Loc: Faber College
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Holly you must be hot and not a cougar if Knox was able to get a hardon.
_________________________
It was a wonderful community with some very enjoyable members. But the vast majority were like German housewives circa 1943 prenteding that horrib;le smell wafting through their open windowsd was just the neighbors having a cookout..--Windsock
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#340321 - 07/25/08 05:55 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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No disrespect to Holly, but since when has Kn*x ever been able to get a hard on, no matter how hot the woman?
Something is rotten in the state of Douchebaggary.
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#340322 - 07/25/08 01:08 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Broccoli Buy Piss Mop
Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 10/25/05
Posts: 1802
Loc: Getting pissed on
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Quote:
Quote:
I think Porn has a lot to do with the COUGAR/MILF trend that's going on. You can't just blame the movie "American Pie." I dig MILFS and COUGARS and I'm glad to see all the MILF porn that comes out. I think porn has set a lot of social trends for sex. Its bizzare to see that whole Cougar craze.
You been blowing guys at Stanford again Knox? That was almost a decent post. Atta failure. Better posts by DNA ingestion, good for you.
No one "blames" American Pie, or Sex In The City, cosmo boi. It's more of a credit. Now google Pamela Smart, or Mary Kay Letourneau.
Porn is following suit not breaking ground, limpdick.
You have no celebrity and your industry breaks no ground.
At best you're 80's rap. Maybe.
Fucken deal with it.
So much hate in your heart. 80's rap is pretty sweet actualy. I'm like the Run D.M.C. and youre the Milli Vanilli! Or 80's VH1.
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#340323 - 07/25/08 01:43 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 1283
Loc: SoCal
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^^ Released in January 1981, I do believe this is the first Rap song to ever get mainstream play even though it's almost halfway through the song before anything even remotely resembling a Rap cadence begins.... http://youtube.com/watch?v=xHPikUPlRD8
_________________________
I'd rather be ignorant than stupid.
Ignorance implies a lack of knowledge which is easily correctable through education.
Stupidity implies an inability to learn.
Therefore; ignorance is temporary, stupidity is forever!
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#340324 - 07/25/08 01:46 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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^^i think i remember learning the same thing, like on 'pop-up video' or something. god i fucking loved 'pop-up video'
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#340325 - 07/25/08 01:49 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 1166
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aye... and Deborah Harry was fucking hot back then... shes probably one of the best reasons to watch Videodrome over and over again.
_________________________
"You're disgusting, you Caligula-esque mother fucker.
But I like your avatar, so you get a pass. "-Chilledstoli
If you're normal, people will accept you... but if you're DERANGED... they will make you their leader! -Christopher Titus
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#340326 - 07/25/08 03:35 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5093
Loc:
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I'd like to be the riding crop spanning those cheeks... 
_________________________
-------------------
Mild Mannered Minion
-------------------
I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#340328 - 07/25/08 05:11 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
Edit: Older dudes, huh? I'll be 40 in october....
You aren't masculine enough for Holly. She'd take one look at your polka dot teapot (never mind you even have a teapot), and be out the door before you could straighten the lace doily on your antique end-table.
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#340329 - 07/25/08 07:02 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/30/08
Posts: 7598
Loc: a site known for its tolerance...
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Well, before my b-day, I'll be sure to wrestle a bear, shoot some guns, chew some tobacco, get some stuff from Home Depot, build a deck, listen to some Skynyrd, serve in Iraq and punch out a fag or two. Oh, and buy some pleated dockers.
Edited by tattypatty (07/25/08 07:04 PM)
_________________________
"I'll never forget the moment during the lovely Alyssa Allure's scene in 'American Bukkake' where the fellow got out of his wheel chair to ejaculate on her face. It was grotesque but had a certain frisson." -Sock
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#340330 - 07/25/08 07:50 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Aside from chewing tobacco ( ) ain't nothing wrong with any of the above.
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#340331 - 07/25/08 10:04 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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You'll have to do at least 80% of that if you want a shot at Holly, plus pulverize some land and plant some vegetables. And that was the subject of your post. As Burg says, I'm here to help.
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#340332 - 07/25/08 11:20 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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Quote:
Well, before my b-day, I'll be sure to wrestle a bear, shoot some guns, chew some tobacco, get some stuff from Home Depot, build a deck, listen to some Skynyrd, serve in Iraq and punch out a fag or two. Oh, and buy some pleated dockers.
LOL none of that appeals to me! Seriously I like men who are well educated (in literature preferably), tall and lanky with dark hair, confident, independent, open minded, self aware, considerate, and with a slightly twisted sense of humor. Must love kids, dogs, and traveling. I'm also a sucker for guys who aren't too well dressed-- a guy who doesn't put too much thought into his outfits shows that he has more important things to think about. Plus it gives me the chance to slowly take over their closet and dress them myself. Yes it's slightly controlling but if that aspect of my personality only manifests itself in the fact that I want to buy you a new wardrobe, is that so bad?
OK there's my personals ad let's put it up on Craigslist and see what gold I come up with!
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#340335 - 07/26/08 11:33 AM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/21/07
Posts: 398
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Quote:
LOL none of that appeals to me! Seriously I like men who are well educated (in literature preferably), tall and lanky with dark hair, confident, independent, open minded, self aware, considerate, and with a slightly twisted sense of humor. Must love kids, dogs, and traveling. I'm also a sucker for guys who aren't too well dressed-- a guy who doesn't put too much thought into his outfits shows that he has more important things to think about. Plus it gives me the chance to slowly take over their closet and dress them myself. Yes it's slightly controlling but if that aspect of my personality only manifests itself in the fact that I want to buy you a new wardrobe, is that so bad?
OK there's my personals ad let's put it up on Craigslist and see what gold I come up with!
Hey I meet some of those standards, but I have a degree in Rhetoric(yes it's useless) from a decent university, but at 33 I guess I'm not old enough for you.
Also I damn near pulled my cock off slamming it to the pictures you recently posted. 
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#340336 - 07/26/08 06:16 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 07/28/07
Posts: 1132
Loc: The Mystic Knights of the Sea ...
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I believe Ken is available as he seems to be on the outs with Barbie. I hear Ken is a macher as an attorney at a top M & A firm. I also heard he got a graduate degree in comp lit at Harvard and was an editor of the Harvard Lampoon. I don't believe he has dark hair though and you probably will be vying with Midge and Skipper for his affection and attention.
_________________________
"I'm a minor character in my own story", Steve Coogan as Tony Wilson in 24 Hour Party People
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#340338 - 07/26/08 09:41 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/04/06
Posts: 358
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Quote:
LOL none of that appeals to me! Seriously I like men who are well educated (in literature preferably), tall and lanky with dark hair, confident, independent, open minded, self aware, considerate, and with a slightly twisted sense of humor. Must love kids, dogs, and traveling. I'm also a sucker for guys who aren't too well dressed-- a guy who doesn't put too much thought into his outfits shows that he has more important things to think about. Plus it gives me the chance to slowly take over their closet and dress them myself. Yes it's slightly controlling but if that aspect of my personality only manifests itself in the fact that I want to buy you a new wardrobe, is that so bad?
Sadly, I literally meet all of these criteria but am married. Otherwise, I'd PM ya and you could think I was a stalker.
_________________________
"Veiny Woman? APPROVED! " -Loopnode
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#340339 - 07/27/08 01:25 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 03/07/06
Posts: 1059
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Quote:
LOL none of that appeals to me! Seriously I like men who are well educated (in literature preferably), tall and lanky with dark hair, confident, independent, open minded, self aware, considerate, and with a slightly twisted sense of humor. Must love kids, dogs, and traveling. I'm also a sucker for guys who aren't too well dressed-- a guy who doesn't put too much thought into his outfits shows that he has more important things to think about. Plus it gives me the chance to slowly take over their closet and dress them myself. Yes it's slightly controlling but if that aspect of my personality only manifests itself in the fact that I want to buy you a new wardrobe, is that so bad?
OK there's my personals ad let's put it up on Craigslist and see what gold I come up with!
How the hell did Luke Ford ever get to fuck you? That is almost criminal.
_________________________
Honestly, I don't know...I'm torn. We haven't talked since AVN (other than the hearing in February)- Eric on Bree Olson
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#340340 - 07/27/08 03:02 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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Quote:
Quote:
LOL none of that appeals to me! Seriously I like men who are well educated (in literature preferably), tall and lanky with dark hair, confident, independent, open minded, self aware, considerate, and with a slightly twisted sense of humor. Must love kids, dogs, and traveling. I'm also a sucker for guys who aren't too well dressed-- a guy who doesn't put too much thought into his outfits shows that he has more important things to think about. Plus it gives me the chance to slowly take over their closet and dress them myself. Yes it's slightly controlling but if that aspect of my personality only manifests itself in the fact that I want to buy you a new wardrobe, is that so bad?
OK there's my personals ad let's put it up on Craigslist and see what gold I come up with!
How the hell did Luke Ford ever get to fuck you? That is almost criminal.
There was a lot of  involved. 
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#340341 - 07/27/08 03:06 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/28/04
Posts: 4450
Loc: The Planet Houston
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so... do I stand a chance? well educated (in literature preferably):  tall lanky  dark hair confident independent open minded self aware considerate with a slightly twisted sense of humor Must love kids  dogs traveling  I'm also a sucker for guys who aren't too well dressed
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#340343 - 07/27/08 08:10 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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Monstar I can't tell what some of those smilies are supposed to mean... does mean '"surprise, me too?" or does it mean "oh no!"?
I'm not beholden to a specific type-- men that I've dated never fall into all of those categories I listed. It's hard to explain why I'll find one guy attractive and not another. I do kinda like nerds, though. Like professor types. I have a new crush-- he was featured on the History Channel's "Dark Ages" and his name is Michael Kulikowski, and he's a professor at the University of Tennessee. I doubt he's tall and he certainly doesn't look lanky, but he's brilliant and has a British accent. Yum!
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#340346 - 07/27/08 10:18 PM
Re: Am I a cougar already?
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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Quote:
Quote:
LOL none of that appeals to me! Seriously I like men who are well educated (in literature preferably), tall and lanky with dark hair, confident, independent, open minded, self aware, considerate, and with a slightly twisted sense of humor. Must love kids, dogs, and traveling. I'm also a sucker for guys who aren't too well dressed-- a guy who doesn't put too much thought into his outfits shows that he has more important things to think about. Plus it gives me the chance to slowly take over their closet and dress them myself. Yes it's slightly controlling but if that aspect of my personality only manifests itself in the fact that I want to buy you a new wardrobe, is that so bad?
Sadly, I literally meet all of these criteria but am married. Otherwise, I'd PM ya and you could think I was a stalker.
Of course you're married. The good ones are always taken.
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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